Lazy Knocked-Up Weekend

April 04, 2005
I had quite a lazy weekend. Chad was still out of town, so I took it upon myself to do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!

Actually – I did a little bit of something – but not too much of it.

I think I have perfected “the nap.”

So – let’s see. On Friday night, I tagged along with the sis and her husband for Chinese buffet at The Great Wall. I did really well. My strategy – half of the plate must be filled with fresh, steamed broccoli. I usually only take 1 piece of my three favorite ultra-fattening chicken items (sesame, sunflower and honey) and 2 eggrolls. I also had a little corn.

Anyway – I only allow myself one trip and the only dessert I may eat is fruit. I wasn’t even hungry, though, after eating my plateful. (I saved nothing for Miss Manners. Miss Manners has lost to the unborn child.)

On Saturday I did a lot of nothing all day – with small catnaps in between. I watched several movies and caught up on my DVR recorded list. That night Mamie invited me over for dinner. They were having salmon, so I brought my own chicken breasts – because I really don’t like salmon. Actually, I detest it.

The bonus was that my cousin Taylor’s new baby girl would be there in all of her three-month glory. Perhaps I could familiarize myself with “the baby human.”

Perhaps I could freak out and think “what in the HELL have I gotten myself into?”

These thoughts began buzzing in my head like wild, angry hornets as soon as the baby began crying for no apparent reason and would not stop. I think I had curled up in a fetal position on the couch and watched in horror as my aunt waltzed and shushed all over the house. I was hoping that our own child wasn’t hearing this behavior and picking up tricks. Actually, I don’t think he/she has ears yet.

Anyway, needless to say, I think I held the baby for maybe 5 minutes, before it began screeching and I became paralyzed with fear. Then I began thinking – you know – I like this baby, but I really want MY BABY.

Does that make sense?

I don’t know. I’ve been freaking myself out with my current state of emotions. I’ve felt quite emotionless for the past 2 weeks and then this morning I saw something in the paper about the otter exhibit at the zoo and almost burst into tears just thinking about the otters and how cute they are in their little watery world. And how my baby is in its own watery world (and might even look something like an otter – minus the fur). I think I may just cry right now.

Anyway – I briefly toyed with the idea of leaving early and going to the zoo all by myself – but changed my mind.

So – Sunday was a very sleepy day. I worked on invitations for quite some time and cleaned up. And of course, last night was the glorious return of the Shmoo. He’s home and he’s cranky. Guess I only have Canada to blame.

That’s about it for le weekend. In the meantime, I’m feeling weird and I just want to leave work and never come back. Not that I don’t like work –I’m just feeling weird. I’m envying all the women who don’t have to work and can sit at home and relish in the pregnancy.


12:37 p.m. ::
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