June 07, 2005
Well it’s been an interesting few days to say the least.

Of course, I never “say the least” so . . .

The weekend was interesting. Chad went out of town on Friday night to have a little fishing adventure at a “camp” down in Point au Chene (a bizarre and dilapidated fishing village that also doubles as an Indian reservation.) Anyway – I was invited to go, but declined the offer because I wouldn’t have anything to do all day Saturday but stay at the camp and watch TV (and plus any number of crazy locals could have broken in and stolen me away.)

So instead, I stayed home and watched TV and CRIED!!!

First, I watched this bizarre movie on the Oxygen Channel called “Deadly Friends” about this boy that grows up to be a psychopath and murders his best friend. Anyway – there’s this part where the press is screaming at the dude’s parents at the boy's trial and the mom turns and is all:

“It’s HARD to raise a child! It’s SO HARD!”

And then she breaks down.

Well, you can only imagine what happened next.

So I cried about how hard it will be to raise a child (and what if he/she grows up to be a killer?). Then I looked on the floor and saw dust along the baseboards and I cried about that. Then I cried because I didn’t feel like cleaning it up. Then I looked in the mirror and I cried some more.

I attempted to call Chad and my hysteria freaked him out a good bit. I told him that I felt like a big blobular useless pile of shit and that it sickened me. Plus I was just crazy with boredom and lonely too. And hungry. And tired. And I needed to pee, too.

So he came home early (with a bubblegum snowcone for crybaby) and cooked burgers and fries. It was nice. (Speaking of bubblegum snowcones – or blue snowcones for that matter, it will never cease to shock me to have the green poo. Even though I’ve had the green poo after ever blue snowcone, I always gasp and think I have some form of cancer and then realize - Oh yeah! The bubblegum snowcone, jackass!)

On Sunday we did the whole church thing and then went to Brusly to have dinner with the grandparents and the fam. I ate an extraordinary amount of food. Then I was chided by my entire family for my snowcone behavior as of late and was told that I am “high risk” for gestational diabetes (translation: humongously obese) and that I need to “watch it.” Which only pissed me off – but I have cut back a bit. I haven’t had a snowcone since Sunday.

Anyway – Chad left town yesterday. He’ll be gone until Thursday. And THEN, the Monday after next, he’ll leave for 2 solid weeks!!! I’ll be crazy! I find that I’m clingier to him lately – since the pregnancy. I mean, I never really minded our space before, but now I’m feeling lost at home. I hate that feeling. I don’t know how these military wives do it.

So – last night I did nothing. Ate dinner and went to bed at 8:00. Didn’t go to sleep then, just watched TV in a horizontal position.

Oh and I think I felt the baby move last night!!! I felt the slightest little tap, tapping about 2 inches below my navel. It was really cool.

Well this morning I noticed the concrete was all wet outside of the kitchen window. Then I went back in and discovered the rug by the sink was wet. GRrrrrrrrrrrreat. I didn’t inspect things too much further because I had to leave for work.

Anyway – my dad and Sara are coming over tonight. He’s going to check it out, she’s going to wax the face and paint the toenails and in turn I’m going to cook them dinner. Should be good.

So that’s about all . . . haven’t cried since Saturday, so that’s good.

12:08 p.m. ::
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